Deshaun Watson’s Ban Proves The NFL Has No Connection To The Real World

Have you heard of human resources? I’m still trying to get an answer on how many settlements I can make until I get suspended. Ten? Twenty?

They are still trying to calculate the fine for Brown’s quarterback Deshaun Watson – he of the $230 million deal – after he recently settled 23 such lawsuits. Six games, as a retired judge ruled and supports the NFLPA? An entire season, as the NFL seems to insist?

In the world we are condemned to, there would be no debate because there would be no job. We’d be fired after one, maybe two. And well on the way for good reasons. Still, the Browns signed Watson who already knew his score. Season tickets, anyone? How about a quickie – a tailgate massage?

It’s relentlessly crazy there. This week, New York Governor Kathy Hochul signed a law that will replace “prisoner” with “prisoner,” reducing rising crime by an estimated zero percent.

In other news, Marshawn Lynch was arrested, charged with drink-driving while twirling around the rural village of Las Vegas at 5:45 a.m. Apparently, Lynch made the math easy for the police when he made his car “undrivable” by crashing into curbs.

In addition, he was charged with driving an unregistered vehicle.

Deshaun Watson
Deshaun Watson
Aaron Josefczyk/UPI/Shutterstock

Lynch had a previous DUI, as of 2012, reduced to reckless driving, and his driver’s license was revoked after a hit-and-run in Buffalo in 2008.

Still, nothing could stand in the way of his career as a TD-scoring running back who added to his fame and commercial fortune by grabbing his crotch when he scored. Apparently, those who hired him to star in Subway TV ads really wanted their sandwiches to be associated with such a fine guy.

Just like the senior class of 2020 at Princeton University. In an unfathomably pathetic act of indulgence, they selected Lynch as their class day keynote speaker, citing “Mr. Lynch’s continued professional excellence” and “substantive work in communities stand alongside his success on the field.”

“Our goal was to invite a speaker who embodies the diverse experiences we have shared as a community during our tenure at Princeton; someone whose professional and personal passions speak to the service-oriented and intellectually rigorous interests of the university.”

And so the brightest kids in Jersey chose to baptize themselves completely. Woke up? They were in a coma.

But it’s been another “such a week”. As reader Mike “Chef” Soper wrote of Aaron Rodgers, “He doesn’t feel comfortable putting a thoroughly tested vaccine in his body, but he was okay with using psychedelic drugs in that same delicate ecosystem. I don’t think he could get any Logic courses with Cal.”

Aaron Rodgers
Aaron Rodgers

MLB Network on Sunday saluted Vin Scully as a man of steadfast class, who put the best foot forward for baseball for 67 years.

Then evicted the class. Back to MLBN’s Rob Manfred-certified extraordinarily indecent “Best Bat Flips”, for kids to consider as the very essence of baseball.

YES shot-caller John Filippelli said this week he plans to recall freshman Yankees analysts Carlos Beltran and Cameron Maybin — the network’s attempt to create instant diversity that caused only immediate and sustained insanity. .

“I think you have to be patient with the learning curve,” he told colleague Andrew Marchand. “This isn’t instant coffee, where you take your water and put something in it and you say, ‘Hey, we have instant coffee, it’s great.’ No, this company is not like that – it takes time.”

He’s right, this isn’t instant coffee. It’s New York. It’s the New York Yankees. Or is YES a development league network that broadcasts to those who pay to hear music lessons for beginners?

Speaking of New York, how do the Nets sell tickets when the underperforming team is now overrun every year by obscenely overpaid, hapless and disinterested superstars? Think Kyrie Irving and Kevin Durant co-GM thing is broken.

But is there anyone in the NBA who is happy? Even lesser players earn an average salary of about $8 million for eight or nine months of work. Who wouldn’t be unhappy?

Serena Williams says she’ll pack it up soon. Vaya con dios, Mrs Williams. She’s another one that only the media, TV advertisers and random make-the-scene yahoos think we all love.

Serena Williams
Serena Williams

But the sporty and right-wing people I’ve encountered can’t stand her. They will not be sold to a rotten winner and loser, a vulgar bully and overly selfish act whose social activism – I threw an attack on the ump chair on behalf of women’s rights! – is both selfish and dubious.

I can’t recall a NFL broadcast that featured running back Frank Gore until his final 2020 season with the Jets, when the TV and radio voices didn’t praise him as a class act. No evidence cited, just the same praise.

This week, Gore was arrested, charged with assaulting his female companion. He allegedly dragged her naked, by the hair, down the hallway of a hotel room in Atlantic City.

Yes, while players and the team successfully encouraged fans to sing at Memphis Grizzlies games, and with Adam Silver’s indulgence, Gore would say “Whooped that trick!”

Watching the Yankees Do the Least They Can Do

To think they allow betting on Gleyber Torres games.

On Saturday, Torres made the final out in a 1-0 loss to the Yankees to the Cardinals, lurched into the sand on a 0-2 pitch and didn’t even bother to watch the first as the ball was still in play. used to be. Aaron Boone baseball – the least you can do is more than enough.

(On the same day, the Mets, who played Buck Showalter baseball, took a late 6-1 lead over the Braves with a suicide attempt.)

But despite all the wild baserunning errors the Yankees made on Tuesday in their 1-0, 13-inning loss in Seattle, the most unforgivably misguided play never made the ‘highlights’.

In the 12th, with the Mariners automatic runner on second base, Torres, from second base, caught a pop-up error on first base. He then looked around and made a lazy throw to second, where automatic runner Sam Haggerty was standing.

There was no good reason to make that roll. It would only benefit the Mariners. It was absurd – the latest in a long line.

Gleyber Torres ends Yankees loss to Cardinals on August 6.
Gleyber Torres ends Yankees loss to Cardinals on August 6.

Meanwhile, YES “Rah Rah” Ryan Ruocco remained fixated on selling Aaron Judge’s next scheduled at bat. On Tuesday, he said Judge would start the 13th. Don’t touch that watch face!

But even when Cameron Maybin tried to tell him, with an automatic runner in second, there was no way the M’s would throw at Judge. And when YES returned from commercials, Judge was already on his way to the first on a deliberate walk.

Don’t believe what you see, believe what you are told, continues:

Saturday against the Braves, the Mets’ Luis Guillorme hit one of the wall in the right. He made a big turn into second and returned to first. On SNY, Gary Cohen said twice that Guillorme made the “smart move” by staying put.

But after a replay showed Guillorme wasn’t running hard for first place, perhaps in anticipation of a home run, irrelevant rationalizations began:

“Well, remember,” Cohen said, “he was thrown on the board last night…so he might have been a little shy.”

Ron Darling added: “He respected… [Ronald] Acuna’s arm to the right.’

But that had nothing to do with Guillorme not running hard for first place. In other words, viewers who know their lunch meats were served a bad baloney sandwich.

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